Memories
by c.moonlight
Summary: Five times Mary remembers, not that she could ever forget. Five drabbles.


**Summary:** Five times Mary remembers, not that she could ever forget. Drabble fic.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Supernatural or anything associated with it.

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Prompt #1 - Conversations

_Can I tell you something?_

His voice was shaking, so fragile she thinks.

_Sure_

She says it cautiously like one testing the water.

_Even if it sounds weird, promise me you won't forget_

_Dean_

She laughs when she says his name because after all this she doubts she could.

_On November 2, 1983 don't out of bed. No matter what you hear or what you see, promise me you won't get out of bed._

His eyes became glassy and she _feels_ his desperation. Knowing this was an important moment but not knowing why she gives him the only answer she can

_Okay_

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**Prompt #2 - Aftermath**

_Or you can spend the rest of your life alone and desperate._

She wants to die.

Sitting there John dead in her arms, that damn demon whispering in her ear, and her life in pieces on the ground around her, she wants to end it all. Then she makes her decision. She sells herself to the demon because she's met a lot of hunters in her life, she knows his words to be true and she's _just not strong_ _enough_ for that. Everyone starts hunting for a reason her father once told her and she doesn't want to be one of those poor bastards who lived hunt to hunt with nothing but their thirst for revenge to keep them warm.

So she kisses the yellowed-eyed monster wearing her father's face and feels John moving in her arms. Her heart breaks as she looks into his bewildered eyes. She turns back the place where Dean was but he's gone and all that's left is a beat up old car. In the deepest part of her soul that hasn't broken into a thousand pieces she thinks

_I won't forget._

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**Prompt #3 – Baby Names**

It's been six years. Six years and six anniversaries since the night they would never talk about. Sweet John, he'd surveyed the scene a while without saying a word and didn't ask any questions. It helped when the time came to deal with the police.

She was happy and pregnant now, and racked with guilt everyday of it, knowing that it was paid for with her soul. Patting her stomach she hopes her baby will never know what she's done. It's a foolish hope she knows but she can't help but hope all the same.

"Mary?"

John looks at her questioningly. She's been running her hands through his hair without realizing.

"It's nothing, just wondering how you'll manage when I have an _actual_ baby to take care of."

Laughing, with the gentleness that made her fall in love in love with him in the first place, he pulls her closer.

"I'll manage, somehow." He says kissing her softly.

"I love you, Mary" He whispers.

"I love you, John." She replies gazing into his ocean blue eyes. It's times like this she can almost pretend this won't end as badly as she knows it will.

"So" he says settling down next to her on the couch.

"What do you think we should name her if she's a girl?"

"I've always loved the name Amanda"

"And if he's a boy?"

"Dean" Almost.

___Never_

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**Prompt #4 – The Apple and the Tree**

"Mommy there's a monster under my bed."

She looks at her two year old son with a soothing expression on her face.

"Now, now Dean you know there are no such things as monsters." John consoles having been woken up along with her by their panicking son.

"Listen to your father Dean." She says pulling the unsettled two year old into her arms.

"B-but I heard something!" Dean exclaims giving his father and her both a pleading look from under his unruly hair.

John sighs "Alright little buddy, I'll make you a deal. If it bothers you so much you can sleep here tonight. Tomorrow I'll check under your bed, how's that sound?"

"Daddy, you're the best!

" Dean cries throwing himself at his father.

She smiles to herself and says aloud "Now it's time we all went to sleep"

The next morning she wakes up on time. Cooks breakfast, waves to John as he leaves for the garage and drops Dean off at daycare just like she would any other day.

When she returns home she goes to her room and pulls out a silver knife and a gun from beneath the loose floor boards under on her side of the bed. Tucking the knife into the waistband of her skirt she moves down the hallway to her son's room. She pushes the door open softly and moves in quickly and quietly. Two steps take her the bed and gun at ready she bends down.

There is nothing.

She breathes out and laughs at herself for being silly. She then proceeds to check the closet, basement, and attic in the same manner. That wasn't fear though, it was precaution. (1)

So he's demon who keeps his word, she thinks later on that night when it's John's turn to check for monsters.

_ Ever_

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Prompt #5 - Destiny

She has an early yoga class tomorrow. That is what Mary Winchester thinks as she gets into bed on the night of November 2, 1983, she has an early yoga class and she doesn't want to be late. Then the lights state to flicker and _she knows._ She runs for Sam's nursery as fast as her legs will take her and is relieved beyond words to see John there.

Mary would kill that bastard the second he crossed the threshold of her house she thinks as she walks downstairs… and sees John dozing on the couch. The pieces come together in her mind in a few seconds and she's never felt so stupid. She doesn't think she's hated anything more than this demon as she enters the room to see him holding her baby, back to ruin her life again.

It spares her one glance and then she's being dragged onto the ceiling. Immobile she screams as an invisible force rakes its fingers across her stomach. She hears John calling for her in the distance, watches him as he walks into Sam's room under her, and silently begs him to take Sam, Dean, run and never look back.

Mary curses the drops of blood that alert him to her presence above him. She never wanted to see absolute horror play across his features in her lifetime. Then she's on fire destroying everything she ever loved in death just like she had in life and she's never been sorrier.

_Ever_

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Read & Review

(1) Quote from episode two 'The Phantom Traveler'

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